siehn | Fic | We Can Make It Through

I turned the stove off today. It doesn't seem like much, but. It kind of is so. Here. Have some fic.

Anyway. I don't know where this came from. I just felt like writing, and well. I wrote. I think Danny just wanted out to play for a while, really.

“Sh, babe. I’ve got you; you’re here with me, everything is good,” Danny barely knows what he’s saying, just that he has to say it. “It’s over, Steven. Do you hear me?” It’s kind of like telling Grace that all the monsters are gone; that they can’t scare her anymore. Their monsters were real, though, and Danny’s not sure he can say that, and make it completely true.

He doesn’t touch yet; he knows better, keeps to his side of the bed, and waits. He’s no stranger to this; there are nights where he’s the one sitting up, pale, and terrified, and shaking; half-convinced he’s still wherever his head put him while Steven talks him down. This is familiar, this ritual of patching each other up, of making sure all the cracks are covered over until the next night.

“Danny,” Steve breathes at last, and it isn’t a question; just Steve grounding himself, using Danny as an anchor the way he’s been doing since they met. Danny doesn’t mind; he never has, and he can’t think of any reality where he ever will.

“Hey babe. Glad you’re back,” Danny says, offering a smile as he tangles their fingers together when Steve finally reaches out a hand to him across the space between them. “You want anything? Glass of water; maybe an advil--”

“Just you, Danno,” Steve interrupts, still too far on this side of shaken, and Danny stills for half a minute. That’s all the time he needs to look at Steve, study the tight line of his shoulders, and decide. It isn’t a hard decision; it never is, when it comes to Steve.

“Hey,” he murmurs, quiet in the space between them, “c’mere, huh?” Steve comes easy, lets himself be tugged across the bed until Danny can pull him close, wrap his arms around him, and bury his face against Steve’s neck. He closes his eyes when he feels Steve’s hand close over his arm, keeping it around him like Danny’s going to go somewhere, and leave him lost in his own head.

He’s got that look on his face, probably; that one that Danny’s never been able to name, but gets because it’d be impossible not to, with all of Steve’s feelings right there in the open. He doesn’t need to see it to know. Sometimes he loves Steve so much it hurts, and it’s too late to ever think of living without him.

“You uh, you maybe wanna talk about it?” He asks, knows Steve doesn’t; he never does, but Danny always asks because he can’t not. Talking is something Danny knows, and silence isn’t, but it’s always been comfortable either way with Steve, and he just. Wants it to be out there, that he’s willing to listen, if Steve ever wants to talk.

“No,” Steve sighs, letting himself relax against Danny, “not really.” Which Danny expected, but he doesn’t complain because Steve isn’t trying to hide behind the ‘I’m fine, I’m a stoic SEAL who has no emotions’ thing, anymore. He already knows, anyway, because he knows all the dark spaces in Steve’s head; has navigated those waters more than once, and he’s familiar with the loud, lingering echo of a gunshot in Steve’s nightmares. “It’s just…Y’know,” he adds, like he thinks the ‘no’ wasn’t enough, or something, and Danny’s heart does a little flip because God knows a year ago he wouldn’t have gotten even that. Steve is trying, and that means something.

“Yeah,” Danny says, because he does, and let’s his forehead rest on Steve’s shoulder, tracing absent circles into the skin of his stomach. “That bad, huh?” And the thing of it is; the absolute worst thing, is that it’s all supposed to be over, but it isn’t, not really, not for them. It won’t ever be, and they don’t talk about it, any of them, but they all know the price for going through that year, and coming out the other side more or less in tact.

It’s worth it, though; always, and well, there are always better ways to spend the night than trapped in nightmares. “Guess I’ll have to keep you awake for a while then; make sure we don’t have a repeat experience,” he says, smug, and Steve almost snorts.

“Pretty sure of yourself there, Danno,” he says, one eyebrow raised when he twists until they’re facing each other, but that haunted look is starting to fade from his eyes. Danny will count it as a win, but he definitely doesn’t plan on stopping there.

“’Sure of myself?’ Is that sarcasm I hear, Steven? From you? Huh? Because I am sure I was not imagining last night with the begging, and the noises, and I can always take my talents elsewhere y’know--” He knows that’s going to get a good reaction.

Steve growls; it is a growl, Danny will insist that to his dying day, one hand slipping around the back of Danny’s neck to pull him over into a kiss. It starts out hard, but slips easily into deep, and tender, and maybe this side of Steve should surprise him, but it never does. It’s just Steve, who gives everything, and asks for nothing, and spills his feelings all over the place without meaning to.

“Mine,” Steve murmurs against Danny’s smile, “and I don’t share.”

Danny’s pretty okay with that, really.

“Show me what you’ve got then, babe,” and he tugs Steve down, pushing the nightmares farther away with every touch.